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As you rebuild your life after your divorce, you’ll want to be sure that you are building on a solid foundation, one that supports you no matter what lies ahead…

What Is at the Center of Your Life?

You tend to “orbit” around certain people, things or events in your life. They are the relationships, possessions and circumstances you value most. They give meaning to life and bring joy to you.

1Take a minute and list the people or things that your life revolves around.

It may be one thing or a combination of items.

Here are some examples:

  • Husband or wife
  • Job
  • Children
  • Financial resources
  • Favorite activities
  • Houses, cars and possessions
  • Friends
  • Health

How Solid Is Your Center?

In our solar system, planets have a predictable orbit because the sun is a stable gravitational “center.” Imagine what would happen to those planets if the sun suddenly disappeared.


Now look at your list comprising the things at the center of your life. Which are permanent (cannot disappear or be lost)?

Most things in your life can disappear. A husband or wife can leave the marriage or die. Your financial conditions can change suddenly. Possessions break, rust and wear out. Your health can deteriorate. When these things happen, your “orbit” will disappear as well, sending your life into an emotional tumble.

In the end, only one thing is permanent. Your relationship with God, if you have one, cannot be taken away. Because this relationship with God is so critical to your stability, it’s important to know for sure that you have the kind of relationship with him that will ensure he is permanently in the center of your life.

Achieving Permanent Stability

How can God become the center of your life? The first step is to remove a major barrier between you and him. The Bible says that our sins separate us from having a relationship with God. Sin is disobeying God’s written commands. Romans 3:23 says, “For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.” It also says that the result of sin is death (separation from God).

3“For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord”
(Romans 6:23, NASB).

Your sin keeps you from God. Many people try to “earn” a relationship with him by “being a good person” and “doing good things.” But notice in the verse above that eternal life is a gift. It cannot be earned. You must receive it from the Giver. “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God—not by works, so that no one can boast” (Ephesians 2:8–9).

Breaking Through the Barrier

If you can’t overcome your sin and earn a relationship with God, how can he become the center of your life? The Bible says that Jesus Christ removed the barrier between God and you by dying in your place. He paid the price for your disobedience. Romans 5:8 puts it this way:

4“But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”

It’s also important to realize that Jesus Christ is the only way to a relationship with God. John 14:6 reads,
“Jesus answered, ‘I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.’”

Making It Real in Your Life

Maybe right now you ache for the stability, security and wholeness that come from having God at the center of your life. Once he’s there, you can access his power to help you heal from your separation or divorce. He can help stabilize your life’s orbit. The first step is to believe that Jesus is God’s only Son. There is no other Savior. You cannot get to God except through him. If you believe in him, you can act on that faith. He can stabilize your life’s orbit.

How Can God Become the Center of Your Life?

The Bible says that each person must receive Jesus as personal Lord and Savior through faith. To do this you must first realize that you are a sinner and repent of (turn away from) your sin. The Bible says,

5“They should repent and turn to God and prove their repentance by their deeds” (Acts 26:20). Receiving Jesus through faith means trusting him alone as the payment for your sin and surrendering your life to him.

“If you confess with your mouth, ‘Jesus is Lord,’ and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you confess and are saved” (Romans 10:9–10).

Taking the Step

If you would like to surrender your life to Jesus Christ, here is a prayer you can pray. Why not do it right now?

Dear Lord,
I know I have done things that are wrong. Please forgive me for these sins. I invite Jesus Christ into my life as my Savior and Lord. As my Savior, I ask you to save me from the effect of my sins. As my Lord, I receive you as the center of my life and give you control of it. Thank you for forgiving my sin and giving me the gift of eternal life with you. In Jesus’ name I pray, Amen.

Things Are Really Different Now

If you invited Christ into your life, many things have changed. Look at what has happened.

Christ is in your life:

I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.
(Galatians 2:20)

Christ’s power is in your life:

I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.
(Philippians 4:13 NASB)

Your sins are forgiven:

In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace.
(Ephesians 1:7)

You are a permanent part of God’s kingdom:

Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptably with reverence and awe.
(Hebrews 12:28)

God’s promise to people who invite Christ into their lives is described in 1 John 5:11–13:

“And this is the testimony: God has given us eternal life, and this life is in his Son. He who has the Son has life; he who does not have the Son of God does not have life. I write these things to you who believe in the name of the Son of God so that you may know that you have eternal life.”

The Bible says your relationship with God through Jesus Christ can never be taken from you.

“My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me. I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; no one can snatch them out of my hand. My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all; no one can snatch them out of my Father’s hand” (John 10:27–29).

What’s Next?

Inviting Jesus into your life is only the first step in an exciting relationship with God.

You’ll want to get to know him better and learn his plan for your life.

If you have just asked Jesus into your life, let your pastor, counselor or a mature Christian friend know. He or she can help you grow even closer to God.

A good way to learn more about Jesus Christ is to read the book of John, found in the New Testament of the Bible. We suggest you commit to reading a chapter of this exciting book each day. As you read, pray that you will gain an even better understanding of how Jesus is changing your life.

You have the gift of eternal life:

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.
(John 3:16)

You can find abundant life now:

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly.
(John 10:10 NASB)

You can find God’s peace:

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
(Philippians 4:6–7)


DivorceCare at Relevant Church is a friendly, caring group of people who will walk alongside you through one of life’s most difficult experiences. For more information, email


This article is taken from the
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